Things That Are Way Too Overrated In India

We Indians are inscrutable at times. It’s funny
how we make a big deal out of everything. But
while some of these things are understandable, a
lot of them are silly and unnecessarily over-hyped
in this country.
Like the big fat Indian weddings. Or every
parent’s dream to turn kids into doctors and
engineers. Or our obsession with fair skin. We
give way too much attention to these trivial
things for our own good.
Here is a fun checklist of such fashionably
overrated things in India:

1. English
“Beta English may poem toh sunao uncle ko?”
Indians are obsessed with speaking in English,
writing in English, dancing in English… Excuse
me! Hindi bhi itna bura nahi hai, yaar.

2. Fairness
“Beta Fair and Handsome try toh karo, fir dekhna
kitney rishtey aayenge.”
Will it get me Sonam Kapoor’s marriage proposal?
If yes, give it to me, aunty.

3. Chetan Bhagat
“Chetan Bhagat ki nayi book padi tumne?”
Seriously? He is the Karan Johar of prose.
Enough said!

4. Reality Shows
“Kya? Tune Rakhi ka Swayamvar nahi dekha?”
Let’s not even talk about this one.

5. Big, fat Indian weddings
“Pata hai, meri shaadi may Shah Rukh dance
karne aa raha hai?”
And I thought getting married was about
committing to the person you love the most.

6. Engineering degree
“Mera beta bada hokar engineer banega.”
Yes mom, that’s what I was born to be. I don’t
have any ambition or dream. I just want to
become another Chatur .

7. Cricket
“Bhai cricket toh mera religion hai.”
There are many other sports that India
participates in you know. Do you watch the Pro
Kabbadi League on Star Sports? Do you even
know it exists?

8. Gold
“Mummy aur kitni gold rings khareedoge?”
Indian moms rule the world of gold jewellery.
Even Bappi Da can’t beat them when it comes to
gold.

9. Honey Singh
“Mujhko na pehchane tu, tere ghar akhbaar ni
aata?”
Newspaper report: “Palwal may hui Honey Singh
ki pitai.”

10. The Dialogue: “Log Kya Kahenge?”
“Beta, shadi kar lo. Varna log kya kahenge?”
“Umm…he/she’s busy chasing his/her dreams.”
This question exists from the time of Ramayan
and I don’t think it’s going away any time soon.

11. Board Results
“Beta kitney marks aaye 12th may?”
Throughout the year, these people don’t even
remember your name but they become your
parents’ best friends the day your results come
out. Auntyji, may I kill you? Please?

12. Foreign Brands
“Kya? Tune yeh flea market se liya? I shop only
from Zara.”
We are obsessed with foreign brands. We indulge
in brands not because they are worth it but
because they represent our status in society.
scoopwhoop

© manab

moon and her friend

we get fatigued
seeking for moonlight..
don’t we?
we don’t welcome darkness.
do we?
light is the symbol of enthusiasm.
ever observed that
little star beside the moon?
he is a good old friend of her.
isn’t he?
but they never
come close to each other.
don’t know why!
yet they are not separated.
they never fade away..
they are together
the whole time..
i think relationships are
supposed to be
like this…

PS: i’m no poet. just tried to be one.

© manab

I Am That

I am
nothing more
but nothing less
I am not
who you think I am
I am not
who I think I am
I am
all that is
and all that is not
I am
neither defined
nor definable
neither finite
nor infinite
I am
that
that was never born
or ever died
I am
that has no word
to describe
that I am
I just
am

© manab

Ocean of Imagination

In this infinite ocean
of imagination
within which exist
infinite ripples
of imagination
Each ripple colliding with another
creating infinite ripples
of imagination
Ceaseless, eternal
never-ending
no one ripple imagining the whole
yet forever and constantly
changing the whole
Out of this imagination
matter forms
out of this imagination
matter is destroyed
The big bang
just one more ripple,
The black hole just a ripple
colliding with another
And so God said
Let their be light
And there was light ….

© manab

KICK …!! why bother?

From all Salman Khan movies, you rarely
remember any other actor, besides Salman
himself, which is just as well, because that is
what audiences pay for. This one also stars
Nawazuddin Siddiqui as the villain who appears
in all of four or five scenes. He pitches his
performance as high as the rest of the movie.
Yet, you can immediately tell, especially when he
is opposite Salman, that if this country had great
actors for mainstream stars, blockbuster films
with scripts as deliberately insane as this one,
would begin to seem infinitely more tolerable still.
Be that as it may, audiences get kicks out of just
watching certain super-stars. They just do. It’s
hard to explain why, just as it’s impossible to
determine who becomes that star. As of now, in
India, we know that super-heroes Spider-man
and Super-man put together don’t add up to
super-hero Sal-man. In this film, Salman is
ambidextrous; he can take on a doubles team in
table tennis alone. He was born with studs in
both ears and as a two-year-old he could dive off
hundred feet into the swimming pool.
But those are minor super-powers compared to
the number of people he can drive into theatres
on an Eid weekend every year. The talk around
this movie will inevitably centre on how many
crores it’s picked up at the box-office as if the
money is going to be distributed among Salman’s
fans.
I watched this movie with Bhai’s bhakts (or Bhai-
tards as they are popularly called on Twitter).
They seemed to be lapping up this Dhoom 4,
where Bhai, like Aamir’s clown, plays the Devil
with a mask, going about looting various treasure
troves with a cop (Randeep Hooda, in place of
Abhishek Bachchan and Uday Chopra) doggedly
chasing him between New Delhi and Warsaw.
Why Warsaw? It’s simple. Devil calls the cop a
“loser”. The cop indulges in serious mathematics
to deduce that with “Loser” he is referring to a
flight to Warsaw. Get it? No? But who the hell
asked you to think anyway.
Honestly, if this was indeed Dhoom 4, at least it
would be a film. Kick tries to offer you so many
extra kicks along the way——hero-turned-anti-
hero (Salman), hero’s papa (Mithun Chakroborty)
, another hero (Randeep), yet another villain
(Nawaz)—that just as you feel the game is over,
it kicks off all over again. Few movies have
retreated to a new story with a complete
flashback after a full-on climax. This is one of
those rare ones. The attempt there is to induce
emotions and show the philanthropic side of
Bhai-jaan, the Robinhood.
Outside of Salman, this movie was only meant to
have songs and action. The best stunts and the
bus chase sequence you may have already
watched in the promo. The songs show off the
smokin’ hot Jacqueline Fernandes in ways that
remind you vaguely of Jennifer Lopez (and that’s
a huge compliment). As for Salman bhai, unless I
missed that moment, this may be the first movie
in a while where he doesn’t take his shirt off.
As you can sense, this conversation is gradually
degenerating to new lows. Reviewing a Salman
film is a lot like ironing a pair of jeans. Really,
what’s the point? I felt this after Ek Tha Tiger ,
which was actually a thoroughly enjoyable
transnational spy thriller (Dabanng was so much
fun too). Stepping out of this one, I guess,
reviewing a Salman flick feels more like ironing
underwear. No, seriously, why bother?

source

© manab

Ohkay.. A New Start Of My Education Career.

hmm.. i’m kinda confused where to start..

since i sucked my last college exams and decided to start this anew [ http://wp.me/p4zyNH-F ] i took admission in the same class again. i was feeling like i would have an easy way out of this. i was excited not to mention.

so there i was eagerly waiting for summer vacation to end and to join the classes..

ahem ahem.. this part is pretty damn hard to explain. what happened next is that there i was going college with a big smile on the face today. conviencing myself that it will be good. the moment i entered the gate i started feeling sad. without having any knowledge of why. so i walked on and things got even worse..!! what have i done! is it worth what it cost? i met my friends and immediately got depressed.. DEPRESSED BEYOND ANY REMORSE. i won’t be able to sit next to them in the class room anymore. my brain then did what it supposed to do. started to recollect all the memories i had with them. well, this might be called Nostalgia, isn’t it? you just can’t concentrate on anything at that time. neither could i. my never shutting wordhole just got muted, for a while. then took my classes (but i’m having a quite hard time remembering what they taught, i was lost somewhere else). came back home feeling like wasted. god help !!

© manab